Ok, seriously.

First of all, someone found my blog by searching “pic art preteen nudes.”  I don’t know who you are, you creep, but keep your pedophilic hands off my blog.  I have no idea how that directed you here, but go away.

Now that that’s out of the way, I went and saw “The Dark Knight” last night.  I may never again need to see another movie (except “The Dark Knight”) in IMAX.  I didn’t think it would be possible for Heath Ledger to live up to the hype surrounding his performance, but it was truly, truly brilliant.  Also, Aaron Eckhart  was fantastic, and well…Maggie Gyllenhaal was in it.  For the 2.5 hours you watch the movie, it is completely believable.

It was also pretty amazing that a 7PM showing on a Tuesday night was sold out - AND that once the movie started, the theater was silent.  From the very first second, everybody was completely engaged in the film.   That doesn’t happen too often in my experience.

What up, internet?

After spending much of the weekend outside in New Hampshire, I have been reminded of an important life lesson:  I fucking hate mosquitoes.

As a child, I was a huge vampire fan.  My first exposure to vampires was on one of the old channel 56 Saturday afternoon double features.  I must have been four or five, and was  at my grandparents house.  My grandfather must have fallen asleep in his chair during Candlepin Bowling, and the horror movies were on unobserved by adult eyes.  I wandered into the room and watched a good chunk of Blackula before my parents ushered me out of the room muttering in my suavest little child black vampire voice “I want to suck your….blood, hot mama.”

Of course, while during the day I wanted to *be* a vampire (it never occurred to me that if I was a vampire during the day, it would be a pretty boring vampire life), but at night I was terrified of the beasts.  I used to roll my blanket up into a several-inch-thick neck-protector that I would sleep with to prevent vampire fangs from reaching my tender young neck.

Never in my childhood fascination, however, did I equate mosquitoes with Vampires.  Turns out, vampires are not terrifying, just annoying, buzzy, and itchy-making.   Also, there is an apparent dearth of superpower-giving radioactive mosquitoes out there.  What gives, science?

Ok, I’m off to the calamine.

Several years ago, I started hearing regular radio updates from Leroy Sievers on NPR. He was a journalist - a former Nightline producer, war correspondent, and one of the “good guys” in network news. His work is insightful and smart.

His NPR series has been about his cancer diagnosis. In 2006, he was told he had colon cancer that had spread to his brain and lungs, and he didn’t have long to live. He has lived past several “death dates” and was even as recently as last year in complete remission.

I have been reading his blog daily for over two years. It’s been an amazing insight into life with a terrible disease. Leroy writes about the day to day in all its glorious monotony and terror. He is alternately funny and heartbreaking, with enough self-awareness to occasionally wonder whether he should even *be* writing about the disease so many other people are also experiencing and enough humility to accept the compassion, shared misery, and even naked voyeurism of the internet at large with true grace.

Last month, Leroy wrote a blog entitled “The Disease Has Exploded.” New tumors were found in his brain, lungs, liver, spine, and pelvis. Now, it looks like the end is drawing near - the blog posts are getting shorter, and he is openly wondering about hospice care.

As someone who experienced cancer from the outside for the first several months of my daughter’s life, I know something of the peaks and valleys of the disease. Watching Leroy walk down into what will likely be his final valley with his myriad fans and well-wishers following behind in the comments has been a tremendous experience - simultaneously heart wrenching and inspiring. If you haven’t read his blog, please do. It’s worth the time, and its worth the investment.

Bring tissues.

Happy day-after-Bastille Day, habaneros.

I just got back from several days of camping in Vermont.  I thought it would be relaxing, and allow me to shut off from the stresses of my life of late.  While it *was* fun, it was an EPIC FAIL on the relaxation front.

On the way to VT, my boss called me basically to yell at me.  That was fun.

So the campground I stay at has a “Family friendly, easy trail” to the top of a local mountain.  It’s just short of a mile long, with some significant but not giant elevation gain.  I hiked it.

Now, in my younger and slenderer days I used to run up and down mountains.  For real.  One of my favorite memories as far as being “in my body” was running down Mt. Monadnock after having run the whole way to the summit, and feeling like nothing could stop me.

Fast forward slightly less than 20 years.  Fat, old Beej gets halfway up this trail and is a sweaty, huffy mess.  I can’t see because my glasses are full of sweat-drippings (which were bacon-scented!).  My unhealthy heart was trying to escape alien-style from my hog-like carcass, and I futilely begged for the sweet release of death.   I didn’t die, so I decided to keep going, being sure death was only a few footsteps away, and if not, the mosquitoes would surely finish the job any second.

I finally made the top of the mountain, which has a fire tower somewhere between 50 and 80 feet tall - I’m a pretty terrible judge of these things.  Still not dead, but exhausted to the point of forgetting my abject terror of heights, I scaled the beast.

Unfortunately, the plexi-glass windows were  so badly scratched with the likes of “Acerock + Tara Amanda NPW Mara 4EVA!” and its ilk to render the supposedly visible 5 states as obscured as the location of Oceanic 815.  It was only when I turned to descend the tower that my fear of plummeting to my death below became apparent.  It took me nearly 15 minutes to snivel and cry my way down that fire tower where I kissed the ground like a Pope!

In any case, I’m back.  I did not die, although I suspect I was close.  I’ve made this vow before, but this time it’s on my OWN domain:  I’ma use my gym membership as more than another keychain adornment.  I need to find a successful way for me to eat less and exercise more.  I miss the way I felt running down that mountain, and I want as much of it as my much older frame can reclaim.

Hey folks -

First of all, check this out:

You’re welcome.

Now, I don’t know if it’s getting older, or having a kid, or general sissification, or what, but I can’t take sad like I used to.  Last night, I watched most of “3 Days in September.”  It was a documentary (narrated by Julia Roberts, who sure does look just like a gelfling)  about the Beslan School Massacre.  Couple that with flipping back and forth between this and the Sox losing their second straight at the Devil Rays (EFF YOU, new name), and I was a sobbing, blubbery mess.
Seriously, though, the cruelty that was inflicted on these people in Beslan - mainly Children, and one man who lost his wife, daughter, sister, and neices, and I was gone baby gone. It hurt me in the heart.  And the tear ducts, apparently.  I used to be able to not get too upset by anything.  Something broke in me around the time I saw United 93.  I think I had been expecting a macho “let’s Roll” retelling of “Fallen American Heroes,” and was jaded and ready to roll my eyes walking in.  Instead, it was a gripping and absolutely terrifying reenactment, and it was impossible to shut off the emotion.  Now, I can’t do it.

Maybe the sox need to start winning again.  That should help.

Ah, poor George Carlin.  While recent years had him out of sorts and out of funny, he sure did a lot to shape my sense of humor in my formative years.   I remember being a late preteen/early teen and “graduating” from Bill Cosby’s “I Started Out as a Child” to George Carlin’s particular brands of blasphemy, and wow did it open my eyes.  He wasn’t so relevant any more, but comedy and free speech owe him many debts.

In unrelated news, John McCain proposed a $300 Million prize for an American who develops a better auto battery.  In addition, he is proposing incentives for more domestic alcohol-based fuels such as ethanol.

While I am all in favor of a government financial incentive to promote inventiveness - especially when it comes to reducing hyrdocarbon consumption, there are a number of questions here.  First - is this funding that would go to an automaker if the company develops the battery?  If so, does the automaker retain the patent to the battery, making sales and manufacturing profit-driven?  Personally, I think for $300 Million, the government would do well to purchase the patent and handle manufacturing without the need for profitability.  Would the battery developed be mandated by government and available to all automakers?  Or will it be limited to exclusively the developer - therefore substantially reducing its effectiveness?

Also, the ethanol thing.  There’s still this world food crisis going on, and grain prices are a major if not the main culprit.  I fail to see how increasing ethanol is going to help anything.
The era of government deregulation of business has led to the problems we are currently facing, and substantial reregulation of major infrastructure businesses - including nationalization, if necessary - is the only way I see out of this mess.  ExxonMobil is not and will never be looking out for the nation or its citizens.  It will only be looking out for the wallets of its shareholders.  Until this is corrected, until accountability to a greater authority than the dollar is established for these industrial behemoths, the climate, energy, food, and security crises will not be solved.

Gah.  Frustrating.

Morning, Conquistadors of the Internet!

I guest blogged over at Funky Carter this morning.  There are a slew of us who graduated from High School in Manchester, NH 15 years ago this week, and we are reminiscing a bit over there.  It’s hard to believe that I’ve been out of school longer than I was in it, but there it is.

Lots of internet rumors abound regarding Chuck Hagel as Obama’s VP pick.  I sure hope they’re not true.  Hagel is right about the war, but wrong about *everything* else, I think.  Oh well.  We shall see what we shall see.

I’m kind of feeling like I want to theme this blog a bit, but I’m unsure where to go with it.  Hence the sporadic posting.  No, I am not going to be a blogpologist, and I promise to be regular.  I’m just not sure about what.

Hey kids,

Sorry, again, for the disappearing act.  There has been so much stuff happening in my life, it’s difficult to find time/energy to blog.

That said, I hope you are having good early summer.  The offspring officially finished kindergarten last week, and on the same day she lost her first tooth.  She was at the other house when the lost the tooth, so I did not get to see it.   We had the Tooth Fairy come Sunday night, and Emma was distraught that she didn’t have the tooth, so I told her to just write a note.  it read “Dear Tooth Fairy,  I do not have my tooth.  I left it in a bag.  Love, Emma.”

She also wrote me a note while I was here at work yesterday that said “Dear Daddy,  I love you.  I am glad you got to see the hole in my mouth.  Love Emma.”

I sure do have a swell kid.

Hi Folks -
Well, I’m making one last push for donors, and reminding you that anyone who donates to the American Cancer Society Relay for Life by clicking the link over on the right side will be entered in to win a great piece of art from Stiletto Heights!

I really appreciate all the donations I have already received, and any amount at all you can give will really go a long way.

Thanks!

Hey kids,
Sorry for the delay in posting.  I’ve had some personal stuff happening, and I’ve get me a bit of a sinus infection that has resulted in early nights.

That said, we did something amazing as a nation last night:  we nominated a black man to be a major party’s nominee for President of the United States.  This has been and will be touted all over the world ad infinitum, but I wanted to add my voice to the chorus.

While I am angry at what our nation has become, and am angry at our government for many of the things it does, and am angry at our populace for its penchant for homogenization, there are times I think I might be wrong.  Today is one of those times.

It’s a good day.